You Know You're A Geek... When:

You know you're a geek when:

• You go online and order a New Motherboard by 2nd day air, and the store you ordered from is only 2 miles from your house.

• You wonder if you can set my laser printer on stun.

• You try to enter your password on the microwave.

• You consider three espressos as "getting wasted."

• You haven't played solitaire with a real deck of cards in years.

• You have a list of 15 ways of commutation to reach your family of 3.

* Your daughter sells Girl Scout Cookies via her web site.

• You chat several times a day with a stranger from South Africa, but you haven't spoken to your next door neighbor yet this year.

• You didn't give your valentine a card this year, but you posted one for your email buddies via social media site.

• The concept of using real money, instead of internet shopping, to make a purchase is foreign to you.

• Cleaning up the dining area means getting the fast food bags your computer desk.

• Your reason for not staying in touch with family is that they do not have e-mail addresses or Facebook accounts.

• You consider 2nd day air delivery painfully slow.

• Your idea of being organized is keeping 'My Documents' de-fraged.

• You find you really need PowerPoint to explain what you do for a living.

• You think a "half-day" means leaving at 5 o'clock.

• You hear most of your jokes via email or facebook instead of in person.

• You've made your family pics into icons so you can spend time with them.

• Your web-browser bookmarks takes 15 minutes to scroll from top to bottom.

• Your wife drapes a blond wig over your monitor to remind you of what she looks like.

• You have thought up about 100 smiles more clever than =(8^)

• Co-workers have to message you about the fire alarm to get you out of the building.

• Every night you tell yourself you will not eat tomorrows meals with a fork in one hand and a mouse in the other.

• You turn off your computer and get this awful empty feeling, as if you just pulled the plug on a loved one.

• You see a good web design and still have to change it.

•  You feel sea-sick and light headed when you finally take those reading glasses off and try to stand up..

• You dream in HTML.

•  You find yourself typing "com" after every period when using a word processor.com

• You refer to going to the bathroom as downloading.

• Your holiday was ruined… there was no internet café in town.

• You take lunch in your office snacking with your chat friends.

• You find you can still get butterflies in your stomach ... the thought of seeing your computer again after your holiday/vacation.

• You have prayers said every time your PC or electronic device dies.

• You ask your doctor to implant a gigabyte in your brain.

• You dream of coming back as a cyborg.

• You're amazed to find out spam is a food.

• You've sat 2 inches in front of your screen with a magnifying lens to see how they made the colors.

• You've spent consecutive Thursday, Friday and Saturday evenings programming a computer.

• You decide to stay in college for an additional year or two or three, just for the free Internet access.

• You can type 70 words a minute but can't read your own handwriting.

• You rotate your screen savers more frequently than your automobile tires.

• The salespeople at Circuit City or Best Buy can't answer any of your questions.

• Your wristwatch has more buttons than a telephone.

• You're replaced your wristwatch with a smart device/phone.

• You can remember 7 computer passwords but not your anniversary.

• Your spouse sends you an e-mail or chat message instead of calling you to dinner.

• You have a functioning home copier machine, but every toaster you own turns bread into charcoal.

• Your hard drive crashes. You haven't logged in for two hours. You start to twitch.

• As your car crashes through the guardrail on a mountain road, your first instinct is to search for the "back" button.

• In college, you coded your homework in HTML and give your teacher the URL.

• You start tilting your head sideways to smile.

• You check your e-mail. It says "no new messages." So you check it again.

• Your dog & cat have their own home pages and the goldfish's is under construction.

• You think people who can't set the clock on the VCR are pathetic!